I knew it. I knew it. All these good stuffs can't all be happening at once. I knew that good stuff will happen gradually, not all at once.
I knew it. I knew there was something more to it. How could she do that?! I mean, seriously. She must have thought that I am a freaking useless, obsolete bitch that will be her last resort. I'm like her temporary last resort, until she'll find a new replacement. That's exactly how I think she thinks of me. She just left me hanging there. She could have said "The plan's cancelled. I've found someone cooler than you to go with me." but no... she gave me an unconvincing promise. So going to hell.
Ughh, like I care anyway. Yesterday was a nice day at home. Slept most of the day. Due to headache and stomach ache.
I have the house alone to myself. Literally, alone, I must say. My grandparents are here and I have my maid tailing me most of the time.
I had my homework done during the night and watched 'In The Land Of Woman' starring Kristen Stewart and Adam Brody. It was quite slow and boring but I just watched it because of Adam and Kristen. Kristen Stewart. She'll be playing Bella for Stephanie Meyer's TWILIGHT. I can't wait for that movie to come out! Dec 08 ppl!
I'm trying to write a new song as I found the chords to it but all my lyrics are kinda mushy and I'm looking for a band song. I've written one though, but it is like still, more of a girl type of songs. I wonder how Hayley does it.
Today, a slow Sunday. Just woke up at 11.30 spent my time in bed till now, with my laptop in bed. We had to cancel 'mengaji' coz no one was at home except for me. I have nothing left to say. I still have Sejarah notes, bio folio, add math and kumon. What a way to spend my Sunday. But hey, I enjoy it. That's all that matters, right? Or so, I thought.
Here are some lyrics from my songs. I have a bout 4 songs written so far. The lyrics will be in chronological order.
Valentine
An unbelievable feeling,
Felt in this tiny heart of mine,
How it flutters and flings,
When your face comes to mind,
Sleep walked and unconscious,
When you walked right past me,
And stared ahead oblivious,
Or could it be, you're looking at me?
A subtle and innocent request,
Something contemplating to ask,
Whether this love,
Might be a fest,
Chorus
Can you be, oh will you be?
My sweet, secret valentine,
Sweets in the lockers,
Holding hands in the hallway.
Soft kiss and wine,
What a pretty friend of mine,
We finally intertwined,
Nervous & shy,
For the moment we will come alive tonight,
Secret Valentine
We'll write a song,
That turns out the lights,
When both boy and girl,
Start suddenly shaking inside,
Don't waste your time,
Speed up your breathing,
Just close your eyes,
We hope tonight,
Means nothing at all.
Darkness
She's standing alone,
In her world,
Staring at me with hatred and revenge,
She never smiles,
She never cries.
[Chorus]
She's in the darkness,
All alone in the corner,
She is cold and nobody cares,
She lives in hunger but nobody knows,
Nobody could see her,
And she doesn't even care,
In the darkness, yeah.
I see her, everyday
In the mirror that separates our world
I'm her, she's me.
Repeat [chorus]
I watched her cry alone in her corner,
Afraid to go up to her,
Afraid that the darkness will fill my world
LIke how it fills hers
And yet, we are the same person,
But in different worlds.
Wide Smile
I didn't think,
I could have done it,
But here I am,
I'm over it
A wide smile,
Across my face,
When you talked to her,
But I'm over it.
[Chorus]
It must be a miracle,
Because I thought it was impossible,
When I was, when I was, in love with you,
How did I get over you?
Because I knew, it was impossible,
When I was, when I was, in love with you.
No tears,
Just a wide smile,
When you waved at me,
And followed her,
It doesn't,
Break my heart,
Why did I love you,
In the first place.
Repeat [chorus]
Commonsense of MINE
How I wish my life is more perfect,
How I wish my beauty is something to kill for,
The consequences of wishing it all,
Might not turn out to be satisfying
[Chorus]
But I need to feel,
Wanted! Can someone want me?
Needed! Does someone need me?
It's a phase that terrifies me,
But is is all worth it
Coz even then
I don't think I'll feel appreciated.
Does it occur to anyone
That maybe I'm cool & pretty
Instead of watching my friends
Comfort me in pity
It doesn't feel good
When I'm watching on sidelines
Being the left over, waiting for someone.
Repeat [chorus]
Is it too much to ask for?
Life with pride & dignity
Instead of feeling down...
Will someone lift these hopes up?
That maybe, I'm worth the living.
Repeat [chorus]
Coz this is my deepest thoughts,
& i need you to hear me out.
Yup, those are my lyrics. I have tons more but those are the lyrics with melodies, so yeah. I will probably have youtube videos on it later. For now, I really need to shower and eat and get my homework done.
Till later, see ya!!
♥ Sakina
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